"Never lend your car to anyone to whom you have given birth."

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"Never lend your car to anyone to whom you have given birth."

Explore more quotes by Erma Bombeck

"When I stand before God at the end of my life, I would hope that I would not have a single bit of talent left, and could say, 'I used everything you gave me'."

God, Life, Talent, Hope

"When humor goes, there goes civilization."

Humor, Civilization

"When a child is locked in the bathroom with water running and he says he's doing nothing but the dog is barking, call 911."

Nothing, Running, Water

"What's with you men? Would hair stop growing on your chest if you asked directions somewhere?"

Man, Men, Hair

"In two decades I've lost a total of 789 pounds. I should be hanging from a charm bracelet."

Humor, Charm

"Being a child at home alone in the summer is a high-risk occupation. If you call your mother at work thirteen times an hour, she can hurt you."

Home, Work, Mother, Being

"Before you try to keep up with the Joneses, be sure they're not trying to keep up with you."

Social Comparison, Trying

"All of us have moments in out lives that test our courage. Taking children into a house with a white carpet is one of them."

Courage, Children, Moments

"A friend will tell you she saw your old boyfriend - and he's a priest."

Friendship, Boyfriend, Old, Will

"A friend doesn't go on a diet because you are fat."

Friendship, Diet, Friend

Exlpore more Car quotes

"I have bad reflexes. I was once run over by a car being pushed by two guys."

Woody Allen, American Director

Car, Being

"I don't run a car, have never run a car. I could say that this is because I have this extremely tender environmentalist conscience, but the fact is I hate driving."

David Attenborough, British Journalist

Car, Conscience, Driving, Fact

"I started out by believing God for a newer car than the one I was driving. I started out believing God for a nicer apartment than I had. Then I moved up."

Walter Bagehot, English Author

Car, God, Driving

"Is fuel efficiency really what we need most desperately? I say that what we really need is a car that can be shot when it breaks down."

Russell Baker, American Journalist

Car, Efficiency

"The very first time I was on a car in Atlanta, I saw the conductor - all conductors are white - ask a Negro woman to get up and take a seat farther back in order to make a place for a white man. I have also seen white men requested to leave the Negro section of the car."

Ray Stannard Baker, American Journalist

Car, Men, Time, First

"The American Dream has run out of gas. The car has stopped. It no longer supplies the world with its images, its dreams, its fantasies. No more. It's over. It supplies the world with its nightmares now: the Kennedy assassination, Watergate, Vietnam."

J. G. Ballard, British Author

Car, Dreams, American, Assassination

"I own stock, and I also insure my car with Geico."

Ernie Banks, American Athlete

Car,

"I lived on the top of one hill and the school was at the top of another hill. Nobody ever went to school by car - we didn't have any cars during the war. So that to and from school was itself a training."

Roger Bannister, British Athlete

Car, War, School, Training

"Should we have background checks, waiting periods? To drive a car you have to pass a test that shows you know how to drive your car safely, you should have to do the same thing with guns."

Michael D. Barnes, American Politician

Car, Waiting

"I have a need to make these sorts of connections literal sometimes, and a vehicle often helps to do that. I have a relationship to car culture. It isn't really about loving cars. It's sort of about needing them."

Matthew Barney, American Artist

Car, Culture